single mummy

my son has got to a age when he keeps asking me when he is getting a dad aka when are you gonna get a boyfriend mother lol. i just look at him and say that one day mummy will meet someone and then he turns around and says well if you don’t want a dad can i have a 2nd mum 0.0… MY SON THINKS I LOVE LADYS LOL.

i was thinking about it today about going on some dates because this might shock you but guys do ask me out :O . but for some dumb reason i thought it be a good idea to read my diary and started to read about what happened to my last long relationship and how badly it ended.

i have been single for a year but scared of the dangers in being in one.

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bring on 2017

i can’t wait to start a new year and put everything what happened in the bin.

2016 has kind of been crap for me…if someone said hey this year your job will change, family dog will be put to sleep, find out ya ex was cheating on ya, son needs more help (life skills/probs) ,money probs (thankyou kirklees), some crazy person will go round blacking your name, date someone and they dump you for money/work, you will end a 20 year friendship…..

lets hope next year will be a hell of alot better.

Tuesday :D

first thing i want to say is this is the first time that i’ve had a week with no drama. no crazy people blacking my name, no friend probs and no ex telling me his life sucks. don’t get me wrong it feels bloody lovely but odd.

i’m starting to feel better again. i’ve started to sleep again and the nightmares have stopped for now. i’m not napping as much as i was when i was low so that’s good news. my hair is still coming out but i’m still stressing over dumb stuff lol…. also no tears or breakdowns this week :D.

stress head

Image result for stressed animalwell i have been to see a doctor and found out that i’m stressed to the bone but like i said well hell yer not alot of people can say they found out there ex was cheating , son has crazy probs at school to a point i’m in meetings, gonna be working for a new cleaning company and know nothing about them ,dog got put to sleep because he was ill and it had to be me who had to be there when it happened because family was on holiday 😦 ,  i was with someone and thought everything was good until it was over , friend fall outs, then clicked on something is not right with something (can’t say online). hmmm have i not said that this is my 2016 (>_<).

been told i need to start relaxing but HOW DO YOU DO THAT (O_O). something is always bloody going on in my life.

2016 has been a crap year for me but also it has made me realize how lucky i am to have a son who thinks the universe of me.

feeling crappy

last night was kind of hard for me. mostly on a Wednesday night i jump onto a bus and head up to see someone but last night i could not do that. i was kind of hoping he would be a man and pop up and say his side to my face but nope…i was home alone so ended up in bed by 8pm.

soon as i went to my mothers after work to pick my son’s night stuff up she asked me if  I’ve had a phone call or a visit but sadly nope and i don’t think i will sadly. i kind of feel like a used teddy what someone got bored of :(.

 

yep single again

yep im single again but not gonna say online why because i’m nice but will say i do not want to see his face again . that was the first time i was dumped for a stupid reason and being told they don’t want to wake up at 5am (>_<). 2months of happiness just gone with the click of a keybored on a phone and i feel used, a fool and a joke. thank god he never got to meet my boy who wanted to meet him.

just feel so pissed off right now its crazy.